ere ya farners, be reedn thus ere

[Anach]

20 step program to speaking like a Hillbilly.

20. JAWJUH - noun. A highly flammable state just north of Florida.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjah bard my pickup truck."

19. BARD - verb. Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow."
Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck."

18. MUNTS - noun. A calendar division.
Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck,
and I aint herd from him in munts."

17. RANCH - noun. A tool.
Usage: "I think I left my ranch in the back of that pickup
truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

16. ALL - noun. A petroleum-based lubricant.
Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in
my pickup truck."

15. DAYUM - A cuss word Rhett Butler used in "Gone With the Wind."
Usage: "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a dayum."

14. IGNERT - adjective. Not smart. See "Auburn Alumni."
Usage: "Them N-C-TWO-A boys sure are ignert!"

13. BAHS - noun. A supervisor.
Usage: "If you don't stop reading these Southern words and git
back to work, your bahs is gonna far you!"

12. BAWL - What water does at 212 degrees Fahrenheit.
Usage: "That gal cain't even bawl water without burnin' it."

11. TIRE - noun. A tall monument.
Usage: "Lord willing and the creeks don't rise, I sure do hope to
see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."

10. TARRED - adverb. Exhausted.
Usage: "I just flew in from Et-lanna, and boy my arms are tarred."

9. OVAIR - In that direction.
Usage: "Where's yo paw, son?" "He's ovair, suh."

8. FARN - adjective. Not local.
Usage: "I cudnt unnerstand a wurd he sed ... must be from some
farn country."

7. EAR - noun. A colorless, odorless gas (unless you are in LA).
Usage: "He can't breathe ... give 'em some ear!"

6. JU-HERE - a question.
Usage: "Juhere that former Dallas Cowboys' coach Jimmy
Johnson recently toured the University of Alabama?"

5. MUCHABLIGE - Thank you.
Usage: "Muchablige for the lift, mister."

4. IDINIT - Term employed by genteel Southerners to avoid saying Ain't.
Usage: "Mighty hot today, idinit?"

3. SEED - Seen, past tense.
Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City."

2. VIEW - Have You?
Usage: "I ain't never seed New York City ... view?"

1. HEAVY DEW - phrase. A request for action.
Usage: "Kin I heavy dew me a favor?"

[gelfling]

Crumbs for a moment there I thought this was a twenty step guide to speaking like a local from my part of the world.

[Anach]

Yes i recognised all too many of those words. Is why I found it amusing